Davis Discoveries 6: Money
by Colony
Summary: This one isn't funny. I got bored and threw in the classic Conan sketch about the Queen Mother, which he doesn't do anymore because she died.


Davis Discovers Money  
How Daisuke discovered official currency  
If I owned any of the characters and companies in this, I would not be living in the hamlet of Portland, Texas.  
  
Daisuke sat in his room watching TV.  
  
"There's nothing good on," he said. "I would read a book, but I only know one letter..."  
  
He was about to turn off the TV, but then he saw a commercial for Mcdonald's, and at the end, they said that a value meal was $3.95.  
  
That's funny, Daisuke thought. I don't think they woold sell food that is that old. And why do they put that thing in front of the numbers?  
  
Perplexed, Daisuke rushed to the phone and dialed Takeru's number.  
  
"Hey, Kari! You finally called!" Came Takeru's voice from the other end.  
  
"No, it's Daisuke."  
  
"For crying out loud, I don't have time to listen to you. I am expecting a phone call from Hikari. By the way, Yamato says you called him while I was asleep a few days ago. It's bad enough when you call me for no good reason, but if you start bugging Yamato, I am changing the phone number no matter what my parents say!"  
  
"I just wanted to ask a question."  
  
"Hurry up."  
  
"How come the commercials say how old the products are? And how come they have those squiggly things in front of them?"  
  
"Daisuke, I have no clue what you're talking about."  
  
"You know, when they say, 'On sale today for one ninety-five'."  
  
"Are you talking about the price?"  
  
"Price?"  
  
"Dear Lord, it's how much money the stupid thing costs."  
  
"Money?"  
  
"Okay, how do I explain this? Money... is something people use to trade, for, stuff that they want."  
  
"Uhhh..."  
  
"You know, Daisuke, those little pieces of paper with the numbers on them."  
  
"Oohhhh. I always thought those were pages torn out of miniature comic books."  
  
"What???"  
  
"So, you use money to like, hey! Is that what they mean when they say you buy something?"  
  
"Yes, o' mighty lord of the dumb."  
  
"WOW! AMAZING! I HAVE TO CALL... oh, wait. Sorry. Habit"  
  
"That brings me to something else; why do you always call me when you think you have discovered something?"  
  
"Oh, well, I think people should know, and well, I just, call you first, uh, yeah."  
  
"What's the real reason?"  
  
"Okay, okay. Listen, deep down, It's hard for me to say this, but, I like you. I know everyone thinks I hate you because Hikari likes you more, and it's true, I don't like that. But you're a cool guy, and, I just use the discoveries as an excuse for calling you, *sob*."  
  
"Are you crying?"  
  
"*sob* No, I... *sob*."  
  
"Wow, that's very shocking, but, touching. I'm glad you don't hate me too much for Hikari liking me more."  
  
"Oh, well, don't worry about that, wait. She does like you more, doesn't she? Ugh, I actually kind of don't like that, really. In fact I, ARRRRRGGGHHH!!!!!!"  
  
Takeru got really scared and hung up the phone. Instead of waiting for Hikari to call, he ran over to her house. He wanted to get away from that phone.  
  
* * *  
  
Daisuke got a call a couple of hours later, from NBC. It seemed that Late Night With Conan O'Brien was low on guests, and they asked if he would agree to come back on the show. Incidentally, Daisuke had just discovered how one made money.  
  
"...Anyway folks, we've got a great show," said Conan, shaking his right arm as he always did when doing the monologue. "Coming back on, our good friend, even though he is a total idiot, like Max, ha ha ha ha." The audience laughed.  
  
"Anyway, it's Daisuke Motimiya." The audience cheered. "And also, former star from the 'Six-Million Dollar Man' and the 'Bionic Woman' TV series, Jennifer Darling!" The audience aupplauded.  
  
After the funny skit, and the commercial, Daisuke came out, and the audience cheered. Conan talked to Daisuke, and Daisuke told Conan about his recent discovery.  
  
"You know," said Conan. "There is someone interested about you, you'll never believe it, Queen Elizabeth of England! Let's give her a call!"  
  
Conan got the fake phone on his desk and dialed random numbers. The tones kept beeping after he finished dialing, and the audience laughed.  
  
"Hello?" said the "Queen."  
  
"Hello, Your Majesty?"  
  
"Is this Corndog O'Bowling?" The audience laughed.  
  
"Conan O'Brien, Your Majesty."  
  
"Oh, hello, Canned-beef."  
  
"Yes, anyway, I have Daisuke Motimiya with me, Your Majesty."  
  
"Splendid, Cold Can." The audience laughed. "Anyway, Mr. Motimiya, I think it's great how you disover things so well, you are an inspiration to everyone."  
  
"Thank you, Your Majesty. Bye."  
  
"Goodbye, Daisuke. Goodbye, Crisp Chips." The audience appluaded.  
  
They went to commercial, and during that time, the Max Weinberg Seven started to play 'Maria.'" Daisuke felt good, having just talked to the queen of England, and he started to sing.  
  
"Mariaaaaaa. I just met a girl named Mariaaaaaa, and suddenly that name will never be the same to meeeeeeeeee.  
  
"Mariaaaaaa. I just kissed a girl named Mariaaaaaa, and suddenly I've found how beautiful a sound can beeeeeeeeee.  
  
"Mariaaaaaa. Say it loud and there's music playiiiiiing. Say it soft and it's almost like prayiiiiiiiiiing.  
  
"Mariaaaaaa. I'll never stop saying Mariaaaaaaaaaa.  
  
"Mariaaaaaa. Mariaaaaaa. Maria Maria. Mariaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!"  
  
Yep, you guessed it. He was rushed to the hospital for, well you know. But his song inspired Jun to write a song, titled, "Yamato." The words are the same as "Maria," except Maria was changed to Yamato.  
  
  
  
  
Definiteley not one of my better ones, but I had laid back on typing these, and I wanted to get one done. (That would be "Maria" from "West Side Story.") 


End file.
